The Most Significant People in my Life

Recently I heard a leadership quote that said, "Focus on the critical few, not the insignificant many." When I heard the quote my first thought was that it didn't sound Biblical. After all, are there any insignificant people? As I began to think about the statement, however, I realized that there really was a lot of truth in it.

When Jesus was here on earth, he could have spent his time reaching and healing as many people as possible, but he didn't. Instead of focusing on many, he focused on the critical few--the few that would go on to influence the world for eternity solely because of His influence on their lives.

God has spoken to me time and time again to focus on the critical few in my life. Obviously for me, this is primarily my family. It is easy to spread myself thin with lots of projects and plans with many people that in the eternal scheme are probably fairly insignificant. I know that friendships with those outside of the family are important, but they are usually temporary and then life moves on .

Focusing on the significant few takes discipline. It takes denying myself what I want to do for what is best in the lives of those significant few around me. That's what the life of Jesus is all about and that is what He has called us to do.

Focusing on the significant few is not all work and discipline however! Actually, I think that the longer we focus on these individuals in our lives, the more joy and rewards we receive from it. Our family is a close-knit family because we have tried to focus our lives around each other for many years.

One of the greatest joys of this philosophy is being able to leave home and the children and take undivided time to focus on the most significant person in my life--my husband! We recently returned from a long weekend at Yellowstone National Park in Montana and enjoyed one of the most memorable weekends in our married life. Staying focused on one person

for life has its rewards--and it only gets better with time!

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Our Annual Picture Taking Day

Springtime is a beautiful time in North Carolina, and we recently spent the day--literally the day--taking pictures at a local garden. One day a year I gather up all the nerves I have and head off for a day of picture taking. Keeping smiles on while keeping clothing clean and neat while guiding nine children through the gardens without the flowers looking like elephants just came through can be quite a challenging task. I think the gardens looked fairly unscathed by the time we left with all our props, stroller, changes of clothing and little boys crying that they were tired. Whenever I get done and download several hundred pictures to my laptop, I always breathe a sign of relief. In spite of all the effort it takes to accomplish the annual picture taking day, I'm always glad I took the time to do it. Children love having their pictures taken, and it's a wonderful part of motherhood to sit back and enjoy the children God has given me. Sometimes it is so easy to see why God says we have to become like little children to enter the kingdom of heaven. There is nothing more innocent than the picture of a trusting, happy child!

Take Them to Heaven

Some would gather money

Along the path of life,

Some would gather roses,

And rest from worldly strife;

But I would gather children

From among the thorns of sin,

I would seek a golden curl

And a freckled, toothless grin.

For money cannot enter
In that land of endless day,

And roses that are gathered

Soon will wilt along the way.

But oh, the laughing children,

As I cross the sunset sea,

And the gates swing wide to Heaven

I can take them in with me!

Author Unknown

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The Funnest Day of my Life!

Another year of homeschooling is almost over, and I have a whole evening of paperwork waiting for me just to complete my record keeping. Many times over the last eleven years, I have wondered what type of insanity possesses me to continue teaching my own children when there are so many other easier and far more reasonable methods of seeing that my children get a quality education. We now have seven children of school age and a couple more still in the "coloring and "eating coloring crayon" stages. Often when I sit down in the mornings and begin my school day, I wonder if I am really doing the right thing by intentionally committing myself to Algebra and Geometry from 7:30 to 2:30pm every day. After all, most other moms have more sense than that don't they? Periodically, I take a walk or find a quiet place to reevaluate my real reasons and motives for committing myself to such a daunting task.

Recently, I was contemplating about the financial reasons for homeschooling. Contrary to popular belief, homeschooling is not the easy route out for a free education. In reality, teaching our children has cost a lot more than I ever imagined it would. Not only does it permanently limit our household to one income, but it is the only major system of education that I know of that is unsubsidized by other parties. Even church schools and private schools are often given financial support by those who are interested in their success. Just one example of this is brought home very painfully ever year at this time when I fulfill the requirements for homeschooling here in the state of North Carolina. Not only am I required to pay for the state mandated tests for the public school students, but I pay lots of taxes for the teachers in my county to receive significant bonuses if their children score well. However, it doesn't stop there. It's not enough that I pay for their tests and bonuses, I must also give each one of my children tests, pay for the tests out of my pocket, and get someone to give them the test. All that to say, that it is not for financial reasons that I homeschool!

As I thought over this past year and all the fun that I had enjoying my children as they learned, I was reminded once again of the real reason for choosing to teach my own children. Because of my investment of time, I am hoping for a windfall of a return for God's kingdom through the lives of my children.

This year we have been able to add to our long list of learning activities that we have enjoyed as a family. I was there when my children saw the Grand Canyon for the first time. I was there when my girls dissected their first animals, and when my little boy finally figured out how to borrow when subtracting. I was there when my children toured the White House, U.S. Capitol, the Creation Museum, and seemingly countless museums between here and Phoenix, Arizona. I got to experience the excitement of accompanying a ferrier on his trip to shoe horses on an Amish farm. I was there falling off a chair while trying to take a picture when my children shook President Bush's hand! I was there when we saw baby chicks hatching. I was there when my kids climbed to the top of a volcano and wondered why I wasn't going to try it! I was there when they started their first worm farm, and their first caterpillar farm, and their first minnow farm, and well, you get the idea. I was there with them to hear the symphony at Christmas.

I was also there this year when Algebra seemed overwhelming, and Geometry seemed like the most impossible subject to conquer. I was there when the laundry was piled high, and I couldn't call in a teacher for a teacher work day so that I could get it done. I was there when nausea from baby number ten started hitting strong and someone plopped a Physical Science book in my lap. I was there when dear, old mom had to make some apologies for cranky attitudes and an impatient spirit.

I think I can sum it up well to say that I was there this past weekend when our children went deep sea fishing for the first time. I was there when my kids hauled in some of the biggest catch on the boat! I was there to see their excitement, and to share in the fun. I was there when I was on the sofa trying to recover from the long weekend of fishing, and one of my older daughters stopped by to say, "Mom, this was one of the funnest days of my life!"

I was there on all those days, and looking back over the year, I am glad I was. It sure would have been nice on some of those "down" days to help fill up that free yellow bus that comes by every day, but I'm glad I didn't. I think some day, I'll be really glad that I didn't. I'm glad I took part in the funnest day in my child's life!

If you are homeschooling and want to take part in our free, online, time-management course be sure to visit our site soon.

The Best Investment I Have Ever Made

One of my heroes is Susanna Wesley. When asked by someone about her method for raising children, she made this statement. "No one can, without renouncing the world in the most literal sense, observe my method: and there are few, if any, that would entirely devote above twenty years of the prime of life in hopes to save the souls of their children. "


The older I get, the more I see how much of an investment of time and energy it takes to invest in the lives of our children. Often our poor excuses for not investing in our children is a shallow cover for really wanting to pursue our own dreams and ambitions. I think Susanna Wesley was never more right when she said that few if any would really give what it takes in hopes of "saving the souls of her children." Taking twenty or more years of the prime of my life is the best investment I will ever make if my children are with the Lord forever in eternity. Why then is it so easy to trade temporary and selfish pursuits at the cost of investing in these little lives? It is a focus that is not on eternity. It is forgetting that a goal of seeing all of my children faithfully serving the Lord all of their lives is a goal that does not come easily. It comes from laying aside everything that would keep me from my goal and only investing my life in what will matter in eternity.


The more that I invest in the lives of my family, the happier I become! If we could ever once realize the tremendous potential that children have, we would realize that every minute spent with a child is an investment that could never be matched!

Speaking of potential, our house is bursting with it! We recently found out that with baby number 10 on the way, we could potentially just start our own mission board someday! Right now we have our own public relations firm every year when we go to the National Religious Broadcasters convention. Other broadcasters have to pay big money to attract attention at these huge conventions. We just appear and the attention is there! Recently at this convention our children shook hands with President Bush and got a picture taken with James Dobson. It all happened on Caleb's birthday, so I hope he doesn't expect it every year!


My prayer is, "Lord help me to give to my children like you have given to me. Help me to give until it hurts. Thank you for giving of yourself way past where it hurt. Thanks for giving your all!"

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The Busiest Days in my life

Today I crawled out of bed at the crack of noon. Sounds like I am a real example of redeeming the time, right? Actually, the truth is that I got out of bed much earlier, but ended up going back to bed with a migraine trying to come on. I get migraines rarely, but when I do, if I act quickly, I can usually prevent having several days of pain and lack of productivity.

Anyway, as I got back into bed, I thought how nice it was to be able to go back to bed and leave the household in the capable hands of one of my children. I thought of the days when I couldn't even think about going back to bed because I had little ones that needed care, and I could only hope that they would eventually need to take a nap--and would all do it at the same time!

Many young mothers often comment to me, "I don't see how you manage a household with nine children--I have two and I can hardly make it!" When I hear this, I usually ask, "What are the ages of your children?" Almost always they say something like, 4, 2, and the baby. When I hear their answer, I usually assure them that while I am busy, I am probably not nearly as busy as they are.

My busiest and most stressful days were the days when I had several children all under the age of 5 and none of them were very capable of doing much for themselves. Now that I have children to help out, I am far less busy, and can actually enjoy all my children much more!

The benefit of training children to help out and be an integral part of the family can only be realized several years down the road--and that is where I am now. I can leave and go out with my husband, or go take a nap when I am not feeling well, and everything will likely be just fine when I return. Getting to this point, though, was not easy. It took a lot of time, training, and quite a few tears.

Here's encouragement for that young, busy mother...Enjoy those little hugs and kisses and wait a while to do the dishes if your little one wants to read books. Spend time teaching your little ones to enjoy work and taking part in the family work load. Someday you will enjoy the benefits of all the efforts that you put forward. I had to get through those rough early days, but now I am enjoying the best of both worlds--little ones with hugs and kisses, and older ones with lots of plans and wishes. Investing in the life of your child will reap eternal benefits!

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The Greatest Need

Have you ever felt that your family had more needs than you could ever fill? Some days around my house it seems like there are so many needs--often all at one time--that I cannot sufficiently meet them all.

Often, as busy women we get frustrated because there is just not enough time or resources to able to what we feel like we should do in order to be called "successful."

I came across a quote recently that really spoke to my heart about getting done what is really important. Robert Murray McCheyne, a nineteenth-century Scottish preacher, said, "The greatest need of my people is my personal holiness."

The greatest need of my family, spouse, church, friends, or my ministry is not an organized and efficient woman that appears to have it all together. The greatest need from me that any of these people will experience is to see me living a life of consistent, personal holiness.

In the urgency of the moment, other needs often rise to the top of my "to do" list, and if I consistently allow it, these needs will crowd out the real needs that must remain a top priority. Not only is my personal holiness the greatest need of those around me, but my priority has to be to encourage and inspire holiness in their lives.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss said in her book, Holiness, The Heart God Purifies, "What others most need is to see in you a reflection of what God is like." If I don't have time to spend in God's presence, I've missed the most important things of all, and will someday ultimately disappoint all those counting on me. This may mean I have to make some tough calls about how I will spend my time today, but in eternity, it will be a wise investment.

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